https://albertalexander.com/content-pages 2024-07-26T23:18:42+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/nav-—-desktop-content-pg 2024-07-27T03:56:05+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/attend-1 2024-07-07T19:17:40+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/appetite-obscure 2024-07-27T04:00:20+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/M1851552390822063822435522376701/bar-fight.mp4 <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Bar Fight.</b> A punching bag is loaded with ingredients for a whisky cocktail. A volunteer is given boxing gloves. The Rocky soundtrack plays, the ringside bell dings, and the diner boxes until frothy. The finished drink is poured into a coupe glass and drunk to thunderous applause. <br /> (Albert Alexander)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Q1851574576997862434018894214141/_MG_5470.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Deep Sea Lime Dive.</b> Diners bob for limes in salty seawater captured from the San Francisco Bay. If successful, they are rewarded with rum. <br /> (Anonymous)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/V1851574717820306692717611250685/_MG_9817.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Rise Up.</b> Diners gather at the base of a hill. They each choose a flag to align themselves with and march along interweaving paths until they meet at the top of the hill, where they share cuisine from historical revolutions.</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Z1851584693229205944484419531773/AO-equity-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Edible Equity Exchange. </b>The diner offers up whatever is in their pockets. An equity artisan crafts custom currency in return: a small sheet of potato starch paper printed with an edible juice reduction using a pepper-grinder stamp. The diner is free to spend or eat the currency as they please. <br /> (Albert Alexander)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/E1851584781386195872742366704637/108.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/L1851584889299648703943243658237/61-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Antipasta.</b> A mysterious stranger sits in the corner, speaking to nobody. Halfway through the meal, they move to the center of the room, collapse on the floor, and roll around screaming while scattering wet linguine they’d hidden under their sweater. When the organizers rush to intervene, they get to their feet and leave, never to return. <br /> (Anonymous)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/R1851585202912744701079330681853/brain-freeze-vertical.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Brain Freeze. </b>The diner is enveloped in a sleeping bag in a hammock. They wear ski goggles illuminated by a blinking bicycle light. A guided meditation plays while they are fed spoonfuls of ice cream. <br /> (Sam Gilbert)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/H1851585297931923424757231055869/hash1-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Hashassin.</b> A server sneaks up on an unsuspecting diner from behind. After confirming that they are not allergic to potatoes, they serve them a spoonful of hash browns. The diner is then invited to join the secret order of hashassins, which requires them to ambush another diner in the same way. <br /> (Albert Kong)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/A1851585451039899236546509468669/objectified.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Objectify Me.</b> A server dressed as a 1950’s housewife makes herself  both table and cutting board for the hungry diner. In order to cut the ingredients, the diner must make use of the knife held by the server, twisting her arm behind her back. <br /> (Andrea Passwater) </span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/O1851585522004523688107154535421/splice.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Hybrid Fruit Graft.</b> The diner stands in fertile soil. A date is grafted to their finger using a chopstick and tape. A server waters the soil and illuminates the diner until another diner arrives to eat the date. (Albert Alexander)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Z1851585625398524221249191343101/toast-1-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Toast for the Toast. </b> Bread is toasted. While it is toasting, the diner offers a toast. The server asseses the toast and determines what toast toppings best reflect it: salt, sweet, sour, etcetera. <br /> (Jason Naumoff)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/N1851585704073887695620428985341/tsuki-no-usagi-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Tsuki No Usagi.</b> A traditional Japanese folk tale is related to the diner. No English is spoken. With the help of mime and visual aids, the diner realizes they should don a rabbit mask and hop off in search of hidden mochi. (Rebekah Randle)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/H1851585772326840768345769964541/tunnel-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg">Two female diners have a fallopian experience involving fresh figs. <br /> (Richie Rhombus)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/K1851587407649149646771230274557/AO_SubteraneanRendevouz_EVENT_sm-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Subterranean Rendezvous. </b>Ten diners are broken into pairs and given assignments, eg. Echo Architects are in charge of sound, humorists (armed with large orange ball) are in charge of morale. Each diner collaborates with their counterpart on a dish. Each team enters a mile-long storm drain from opposite ends, five via a muddy creek and five via a canoe in the Alameda straight. They meet in the middle of the storm drain for a surreptitious dinner. <br /> (Albert Alexander and Richie Rhombus) </span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/S1851614275276552772512030323709/Three-Temptations-1-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Three Temptations. </b>The diner confronts a series of seducers offering love (candy), wealth (mayonnaise), and status (theft of meal). They are coached to abstain, eating a plain hardboiled egg. In the process they uncover the sad secret of the Enviable Man. (Albert Alexander)</span> </div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/F1851614522481370104293731529725/75.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Eight Escapes.</b> A diner is locked in a rolling trunk and wheeled crazily around the basement. At each of eight stops, they are fed a powerful elixer of strange herbs and flavors. <br /> (Richie Rhombus)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/W1851614646019215165926598702077/2014-09-14-16.32.39.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Thesauromancy. </b>The diners’ fortune is told via using a verbal diagram. They receive their fortune in the form of a custom elixer with symbolic ingredients. <br /> (Julie Crossman)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/N1851623285976077201490417742845/AO9-34.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Human Egestion.</b> A diner is shown an instruction video detailing the digestive process. At each stage, they are fed an hors d’oeuvre representing that digestive stage, from a shot of light citrus water to a handful of brownie crumbles. <br /> (Alex Gourley)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/R1851623667048916276182335026173/AO9-54-2.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>What Is Funny?</b> A clown dressed only in tighty whities, hat, and bicycle horn confesses to a sucrose addiction. They beg and plead with the attendees until someone finally agrees to pie them. <br /> (Richie Rhombus) </span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Z1851625661068163667890026509309/compass2.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/G1851703776499168425747938997245/ukraine-revn.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>The Revolution of Dignity. </b>A diner is blindfolded. A vial of borscht is dangled in front of them using a fishing pole. The diner grasps aroudn blindly until they seize the vial and drink it. <br /> (Nia Person)</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/V1851703967681224005673731945469/ScottFin_0503_152622-sm.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Chronos Island. </b>Diners are transported to a private island via boat. On the island reside characters from centuries and millenia past, each offering food and performances.</span></div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/T1851712900498594955450392441853/mirror-mimic-1.jpg <div style="text-align: left"><span class="caption-lg"><b>Mirror Mimic.</b> Two diners sit opposite each other at a prepared table. Every ingredient on the table has a corresponding ingredient in the same spot on the other side. One diner mirrors the other, combining different ingredients using the same motions.<br /> (Anonymous)</span> </div> https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/D1859582861209371966492437574653/44.jpg https://albertalexander.com/sound-poisoning 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/M1851552390822063822435522376701/bar-fight.mp4 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/C1851701630737004283705475920893/Sound Poisoning with Albert Alexander and Danielle Baskin https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/M1851720855952124647873879667709/albert-danielle-sound.jpg https://albertalexander.com/soylent-2033 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/M1851552390822063822435522376701/bar-fight.mp4 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/P1851779405253731815337164993533/SOYLENT 2033 https://albertalexander.com/the-witness 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/M1851552390822063822435522376701/bar-fight.mp4 Raw Cinnabar https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/G1852991755563809776100452267005/blue-wool-card.jpg UV Test Strips https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/M1852994911598806602993928696829/witness-mini-cropped.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/P1852999224945633126277254411261/metal-halide-light.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/I1853000269160474906753842738173/witness-pan.MOV https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1853006781414535248436849734653/witness-closet.MOV https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/U1853031518240083675913633068029/faded-paper-vert-mobile.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/S1853032708626925496464708400125/witness-paper-make.JPG https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Z1853032774850736721081998701565/witness-red-paper-wet.JPG https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/P1853038477753900828758428546045/the-witness-cropped.jpg Nausea, 2021 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/C1853051929802208908490720343037/cinnabar-hgs.jpg Raw Cinnabar https://albertalexander.com/sculpture 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Q1858483380162154329045693297661/Sculpture Gallery https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/F1858492934966841956161015182333/IMG_20200725_210616.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/J1858493632512022359413999989757/swimmers.jpg The Swimmers https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/F1858499990422175036369188615165/samson.jpg Samson https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/L1858502743561834549372348199933/girl.jpg Girl https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/S1858505954475894995551740687357/leap.jpg Leap https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/B1858506537964856791058567853053/archer.jpg Archer https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/U1858507892546167611698362119165/guillotine.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/J1858509832774709284469001090045/monopod-frame.jpg Monopod https://albertalexander.com/food-writing-menu-1 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/read-s4 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/food-writing-menu-courses 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/poorly-labeled-luxury-chocolate 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/K1864395139797634762748594942973/chocolate-door.png https://albertalexander.com/corn 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://albertalexander.com/grapes 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/D1864396797938566060352770601981/flame-tokay-ucdavis.jpeg https://albertalexander.com/the-taco-bell-at-the-edge-of-the-universe 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/S1864419192802380377812299871229/taco-bell-oakland.jpeg https://albertalexander.com/a-fox-at-the-table 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Z1864426898450101824061039113213/san-pancho-albert.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/F1864427829955337314172267066365/Guachimontones.jpg <i>Los Guachimontones, just outside Guadalajara<br /> <br /> <br /> </i><span class="essay-bodycopy">I felt my heart and mind slow as I floated in a warm, deep place, cozy and hidden. The heat of roasted chili peppers rose in a long, gentle wave, suffusing my whole body, as if I was curled up on the belly of a massive dozing beast, rising and falling with its breath, the both of us reluctantly rousing ourselves at the end of a long winter. Mixed in with those chilis were subtle savory flavors, impossible to identify, unrolling a landscape of earth and flowers around me, an indecipherable bounty. <br /> <br /> Then, in the distance, an acidic brightness that felt light and thin. The quick nip of tomatillo, heightened by the chili’s spice. Alone, those tomatilloes would be easy to make out. Their flavor is so simple, so clear. But through the sleepy eyes of that great snoring beast, the undulating heat of lard and chili and the surrounding spices, the tomatillo felt out of focus. I could feel the distance of it, sharp and quick but with hazy edges. <br /> <br /> From that great distance, I saw a son. He’d left his home, learned much, and brought it home to his family, who didn’t quite understand but still love him. <br /> <br /> That is the son I try to be. <br /> <br /> I wish I remembered the name of the restaurant. Even without a name, I’m sure I could find it again. I can see it now. At night, in a certain district, not far from the graffitied coffee shop and the plaza they light up at Christmastime, I find the open archway. Through the archway, despite the hour, a miracle: an open table waiting for me.<br /> <br /> At that table sits a fox.<br /> <br /> I hesitate. Am I welcome at this table? I probably smell like soap and street food. Will that offend the fox? Will I, in my anxiety and excitement, scare it away? Is this the sort of food a fox wants to eat?<br /> <br /> The fox looks back at me. I cannot read its expression. It is an animal.<br /> <br /> We order off the menu together.</span> https://albertalexander.com/brillat-savarin-the-man,-the-cheese-1 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/N1864432669181943890767490249725/Brillat-Savarin-man.jpeg https://albertalexander.com/the-french-laundry 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/T1888342191204550409806105211901/french-laundry-kitchen.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Z1888343260746771803485907907581/french-laundry-tin.jpg https://albertalexander.com/read-s3 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/slim-jim-pure-mono 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/H1888345926264396966368697316349/slim-jim.png https://albertalexander.com/slim-jim 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/H1888345926264396966368697316349/slim-jim.png https://albertalexander.com/aebleskiver-and-sausage-plate 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/T1888411585937294321473491235837/solvang-med.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/R1888411827257600293741845476349/Solvang-Sausage.jpeg https://albertalexander.com/grocery-store-sushi 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/O1888449545960843850241869018109/grocery-sushi.jpeg https://albertalexander.com/pastrami-sandwich 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/V1890178145633083537651851260925/sauls-tiff-w-on-yelp.jpeg https://albertalexander.com/alison's-risotto 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/P1888419147608178272419180114941/alison-risotto.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/L1888419408408245986524820861949/alison-risotto-and-me.jpg https://albertalexander.com/bone-marrow-and-oxtail-marmalade 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/F1888423274439975466425229439997/bone-marrow-and-oxtail-marmalade-1.png https://albertalexander.com/k-drama,-covid,-and-beef-flank-soup 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/D1888426820992544333749913580541/crash-landing.jpeg https://albertalexander.com/read-s2 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://albertalexander.com/iceberg-lettuce 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/R1888411827257600293741845476349/Solvang-Sausage.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Z1888443851949010386093443052541/iceberg-lettuce.png https://albertalexander.com/artichoke-basille's-pizza 2024-08-08T20:42:29+00:00 always 0.5 https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1858526489871013194941047960573/corn.jpeg https://freight.cargo.site/t/original/i/Y1859638140087722305989316899837/white-texture.jpg 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